In an attempt to better arm myself out in the new scary dating world, I decided to read the book "The Art of Seduction" by Robert Greene (also the author of "48 Laws of Power"). I started reading it not so much to get tips and pointers to learn how to seduce others, but more so to be able to spot attempts to seduce me, particularly those attempts of a more nefarious nature. The first part of the book describes different "seduction styles" to help you identify what variety of seducer that you are. I was so taken by what I feel is my particular seduction style that I went so far as to tattoo its symbol on my body and have started incorporating it in many other aspects of my life (I use it in my business, too). My particular seduction style, according to Robert Greene, is The Dandy (in particular, the Masculine Dandy) and its symbol is the Orchid.
Here's what Greene has to say about my particular seduction style:
Most of us feel trapped within the limited roles that the world expects us to play. We are instantly attracted to those who are more fluid, more ambiguous, than we are—those who create their own persona. Dandies excite us because they cannot be categorized, and hint at a freedom we want for ourselves. They play with masculinity and femininity; they fashion their own physical image, which is always startling; they are mysterious and elusive. They also appeal to the narcissism of each sex: to a woman they are psychologically female, to a man they are male. Dandies fascinate and seduce in large numbers. Use the power of the Dandy to create an ambiguous, alluring presence that stirs repressed desires.
The two emotions that almost every male felt in the presence of Lou Andreas-Salomé were confusion and excitement—the two prerequisite feelings for any successful seduction. People were intoxicated by her strange mix of the masculine and the feminine; she was beautiful, with a radiant smile and a graceful, flirtatious manner, but her independence and her intensely analytical nature made her seem oddly male. This ambiguity was expressed in her eyes, which were both coquettish and probing. It was confusion that kept men interested and curious: no other woman was like this. They wanted to know more. The excitement stemmed from her ability to stir up repressed desires. She was a complete nonconformist, and to be involved with her was to break all kinds of taboos. Her masculinity made the relationship seem vaguely homosexual; her slightly cruel, slightly domineering streak could stir up masochistic yearnings, as it did in Nietzsche. Salomé radiated a forbidden sexuality. Her powerful effect on men—the lifelong infatuations, the suicides (there were several), the periods of intense creativity, the descriptions of her as a vampire or a devil—attest to the obscure depths of the psyche that she was able to reach and disturb.
The Masculine Dandy succeeds by reversing the normal pattern of male superiority in matters of love and seduction. A man's apparent independence, his capacity for detachment, often seems to give him the upper hand in the dynamic between men and women. A purely feminine woman will arouse desire, but is always vulnerable to the man's capricious loss of interest; a purely masculine woman, on the other hand, will not arouse that interest at all. Follow the path of the Masculine Dandy, however, and you neutralize all a man's powers. Never give completely of yourself; while you are passionate and sexual, always retain an air of independence and self-possession. You might move on to the next man, or so he will think. You have other, more important matters to concern yourself with, such as your work. Men do not know how to fight women who use their own weapons against them; they are intrigued, aroused, and disarmed. Few men can resist the taboo pleasures offered up to them by the Masculine Dandy.
Its shape and color oddly suggest both sexes, its odor is sweet and decadent—it is a tropical flower of evil. Delicate and highly cultivated, it is prized for its rarity; it is unlike any other flower.
The orchid has several deep and long-standing meanings. Ironically, some of those meanings are overtly masculine in nature, while others are overtly feminine. On the masculine side, the name "orchis" itself stems from the Greek word meaning testicle, and is associated with the flower because of the shape of the tuberoids which grow on the roots. Among multiple meanings, one meaning the Chinese associate with the orchid is the "Perfect Man."
On the feminine side, the orchid is also a symbol of beauty, charm, and refinement. In Greek mythology, Satyrion - for whom a family of orchids is named- was a nymph who gave birth to a child fathered by Poseidon. Due to its beauty and its fragrance, the orchid is often referred to as the Flower of Magnificence.
Here's what Greene has to say about my particular seduction style:
Most of us feel trapped within the limited roles that the world expects us to play. We are instantly attracted to those who are more fluid, more ambiguous, than we are—those who create their own persona. Dandies excite us because they cannot be categorized, and hint at a freedom we want for ourselves. They play with masculinity and femininity; they fashion their own physical image, which is always startling; they are mysterious and elusive. They also appeal to the narcissism of each sex: to a woman they are psychologically female, to a man they are male. Dandies fascinate and seduce in large numbers. Use the power of the Dandy to create an ambiguous, alluring presence that stirs repressed desires.
The two emotions that almost every male felt in the presence of Lou Andreas-Salomé were confusion and excitement—the two prerequisite feelings for any successful seduction. People were intoxicated by her strange mix of the masculine and the feminine; she was beautiful, with a radiant smile and a graceful, flirtatious manner, but her independence and her intensely analytical nature made her seem oddly male. This ambiguity was expressed in her eyes, which were both coquettish and probing. It was confusion that kept men interested and curious: no other woman was like this. They wanted to know more. The excitement stemmed from her ability to stir up repressed desires. She was a complete nonconformist, and to be involved with her was to break all kinds of taboos. Her masculinity made the relationship seem vaguely homosexual; her slightly cruel, slightly domineering streak could stir up masochistic yearnings, as it did in Nietzsche. Salomé radiated a forbidden sexuality. Her powerful effect on men—the lifelong infatuations, the suicides (there were several), the periods of intense creativity, the descriptions of her as a vampire or a devil—attest to the obscure depths of the psyche that she was able to reach and disturb.
The Masculine Dandy succeeds by reversing the normal pattern of male superiority in matters of love and seduction. A man's apparent independence, his capacity for detachment, often seems to give him the upper hand in the dynamic between men and women. A purely feminine woman will arouse desire, but is always vulnerable to the man's capricious loss of interest; a purely masculine woman, on the other hand, will not arouse that interest at all. Follow the path of the Masculine Dandy, however, and you neutralize all a man's powers. Never give completely of yourself; while you are passionate and sexual, always retain an air of independence and self-possession. You might move on to the next man, or so he will think. You have other, more important matters to concern yourself with, such as your work. Men do not know how to fight women who use their own weapons against them; they are intrigued, aroused, and disarmed. Few men can resist the taboo pleasures offered up to them by the Masculine Dandy.
Symbol: The Orchid.
Its shape and color oddly suggest both sexes, its odor is sweet and decadent—it is a tropical flower of evil. Delicate and highly cultivated, it is prized for its rarity; it is unlike any other flower.(Robert Greene, The Art of Seduction)
After reading this, I was quite intrigued and did a little more research into the meaning behind orchids:
Orchids are a long-lasting and particularly elegant type of flower. Their graceful appearance draws immediate attention, and their reputation as an exotic and unusual flower evokes a sense of refinement and innocence. Despite their versatility, there is something distinctly exotic about orchids. They are intricately beautiful to the everyday flower lover and are considered to be some of the world's most evolved flowers to flower specialists.
The orchid has several deep and long-standing meanings. Ironically, some of those meanings are overtly masculine in nature, while others are overtly feminine. On the masculine side, the name "orchis" itself stems from the Greek word meaning testicle, and is associated with the flower because of the shape of the tuberoids which grow on the roots. Among multiple meanings, one meaning the Chinese associate with the orchid is the "Perfect Man."
On the feminine side, the orchid is also a symbol of beauty, charm, and refinement. In Greek mythology, Satyrion - for whom a family of orchids is named- was a nymph who gave birth to a child fathered by Poseidon. Due to its beauty and its fragrance, the orchid is often referred to as the Flower of Magnificence.
Perhaps it is those meanings which combine the masculine and feminine that best represent the orchid flower. In Confucian teachings, the orchid was the symbol for numerous progeny. It was considered a love potion and aphrodisiac in many countries, including Egypt, Germany, China, and Africa.
But as against its external looks, orchids also symbolize strength.
Thus, this is what lead me to the design of Le Divorce Tattoo:
If that isn't seductive, I don't know what is.
