Fin

This will be my last blog post here at Adventures in Divorce. I can't say I've been thinking about this for awhile.... like many decisions I make it came more in the form of an epiphany than mulling over it, weighing the pros and cons, and finally arriving at a decision. That's not to say this is a rash, un-thought out decision. I think it's just time.

Originally when I started this blog, the purpose was somewhat therapeutic for me..... so much craziness was going on dealing with my divorce that I needed to let it out (and sometimes laugh) to keep from crying. I wanted to connect with other people going through similar issues with divorce and its aftermath by sharing my experiences, thoughts and stories. But now I feel confined by it.... I find myself wanting to write about certain things and deciding not to because it didn't fit with the "theme" of the blog. Then came the issue of not wanting to write about an active relationship as not to say something that I would regret later, or just not feeling like it was appropriate to discuss such subjects in the blogosphere. As the divorce drama started to die down and the dating roller coaster (if I was even on one.... that's a whole 'nother subject) began to slow, I found that I had less and less relevant material to write about. I also never set out to be another relationship advice blog, because goodness knows there are enough of them out there written by people who've never had a relationship last more than a year (I'm being hyperbolic here, but you know what I'm saying.... or at least, you should). I don't profess to have the answers about anything... all I can do is share what I've been through, and my thoughts, theories and reactions to them. But that's where I'm starting to see it go, so I figure I ought to just put it out of its misery now.

More importantly, though, I'm finding myself mired in the past way too much, and this blog is one of the symbolic anchors holding me back. The name itself is an albatros: Adventures in Divorce. I'm tired of the title of "divorcee" and am ready to get on with the business of life that comes after the divorce. I'm ready to shake off all the vestiges of that season in my life and enter a new one. Hell, my login still contains my old last name, so I'm reminded of the ordeal every time I sign into my blog (and I always get kicked out of my current Gmail account, so I can't even blog and e-mail/chat at the same time).

I've also learned a lot in the past year and a half and made A LOT of mistakes..... mistakes in attitude, judgment, action and perspective. And I have learned from these mistakes. Some of my posts I will stand by to this day, but many of them reflect flawed or distorted thinking at the time I wrote them. The unfortunate (but also fortunate) thing about written words is that they are static..... the thoughts and attitudes behind them may have changed, but the words always stay the same. I view blog posts similar to the way I view photographs.... they are snapshots in time. Nobody expects the people and the scenarios depicted in the photo to remain just as they are in the picture. But I can't expect people to read these posts like I do..... as a progression, a journey. It is easy to assume that a blog post I wrote a year ago reflects my thoughts and feelings on the subject now, and I can almost guarantee you that's not the case. I have been through so much emotional turmoil and so much personal growth and change that I don't want some of these attitudes attributed to me now, and I don't want the emotional burden of those words on me. Viewpoints change, arguments change, attitudes change, actions change..... but words don't. I'm glad that I have these written snapshots as a reminder of where I have been and where I am going, but it's time to put them away.

Don't fret though, loved ones..... I didn't say I was done blogging. I just said I'm done with THIS blog. I want to open up my blog to whatever I feel like writing about and not be confined to divorce and dating and parenting and DRAMA. I think I'm going to import some of my favorites from AID, but the rest are eventually going into my personal archives..... maybe I'll pull them out when I've finally reached that happier place. But right now I need to do something to get to that happier place, and dwelling in and on the past is getting me nowhere.*

*Sidenote: It was brought to my attention that one attributes of Cancers is that we tend to dwell in and hold onto the past. I can't say I disagree with that, so with that said I am making a conscious choice not to now that I am aware of that tendency. The first step toward recovery is acceptance that you have a problem....... right?

So, coming soon you can find the new and improving (can't even say improved, cuz that's what life is all about.... constantly improving) me at a new address in the blogosphere..... I'm not even going to use my same pseudonym anymore. My snake, Pandora, died the other day (in case you didn't know, Anesidora is another name for Pandora), plus I don't want to be that person anymore. Likewise, the Twitter account is going as well. That's the beautiful (and tragically sad) thing about the Internet..... reinvention is just a delete key away. I'll leave the blog up for a little while, but soon it will be gone. Please conduct yourselves accordingly.

Idiosyncratic Thoughts of an Unheeded Prophetess....... coming soon (like as in NOW).

AID..... Fin.