Adventures in Divorce

I always wondered why people who murdered their spouses didn't just get a divorce.... I now understand why

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Location: Nap Town, Indie-anne-ahhhhhh!, United States

No, I'm not a prophetess. Cassandra, according to Greek mythology, spurned the advances of the Greek god Apollo and her gift of prophecy was cursed so that her predictions would never be believed. Such is my life. I tend not to think like most people, which is a gift... but also a curse. So step into my mind, take off your shoes and stay for awhile... you're always welcome, loved ones.

August 25, 2009

"Did you see my Tweet about.......?"

So yes, loved ones, I know I've been seriously slacking on the blogging front. But it's really been for legitimate reason, I swear...... ok, maybe not swear, but that's my present argument. But for real, part of the reason is that this blog originally was to be about my "adventures" going through and post-divorce, and one very fruitful source of inspiration is the world of dating.

Well, I'm not dating.

Yes, loved ones, I've been officially boo'd up for quite some time now, so there is much less tom- and kimfoolery to write about.

Except.... there really is.

However, since I would like to remain outside of the world of dating, I can't write about all the issues I think about and deal with in the day to day world of relationships. Ok, so there are many benign topics I could write about if I would quit being lazy and actually sit down to a keyboard to type something other than a Tweet but anyone with a relationship-themed blog who is actually IN a relationship knows that this is a veritable minefield of potential drama (which means that the most open and honest relationship blogs come from those people who AREN'T in relationships..... hmmm, think about that for a minute, loved ones). And as a person who tends to not trip about many things that normal human beings trip about, thus leading me directly to these mines, my inclination has just been to avoid the field altogether as not to inadvertently cause an explosion by being asked to explain and justify what I meant or get grilled about the ulterior motives of my post. And I'm not falling into the trap of "Say whatever is on your mind..... I won't get mad."

*long Napoleon Dynamite-esq sigh*

Anyway, one thing I have noticed is not only how blogging has an impact on relationships (or rather, relationships have an impact on blogging) but also another relatively recent social networking phenomenon: Twitter. As the saying goes, you're nobody til somebody Tweets you..... ok, maybe not, but my point is that it seems EVERYONE is on Twitter these days, and most likely if you're on Twitter, your boo-thang is on Twitter, too. And of course you follow each other. The result of this is that you are privy to your love muffin's thoughts and experiences all day.

Cute and special, right? It's great that you know that your hunny got a speeding ticket the very MOMENT it happens (because true Twitter heads would be Tweeting the news while they are waiting for the cop to finish writing out the ticket), verdad?

Sure..... and no.

Of course you can e-interact with your boo with an @ reply, or even a direct message, which is almost, but not quite, the same thing as talking to them about it (I'm a believer that text messaging and e-mails and the like are valid forms of communication.... I'm a modern girl). The conundrum arises when you get home. Because your boo already knows that you got a speeding ticket, ate maque choux at Yats for lunch, found out your BFF is pregnant, and think your co-worker is a moron.... what is there left to talk about? I frequently find myself starting off conversations with "Did you see my Tweet about......?" Of course, I usually didn't go into the entire situation in 140 characters or less so I do have SOMETHING to talk about, but I've just noticed that Twitter has had a definite influence in my verbal communications, whether that's an assumption that he already knows what I'm talking about and has some frame of reference, or that the matter was so inconsequential that 140 characters was sufficient to address it and it doesn't need to be discussed again.

Two ways to look at this: (1) Twitter hinders conversation because you've already talked about what you were going to talk about so there's no need to talk about it again for fear of being redundant, or (2) Twitter filters out the BS chatter so you're not subject to it after a long day of work (more of a bonus for men who complain that their girls talk too damn much, but I'm not one of those type of women anyway). I guess this really depends on what type of Tweeter you are, whether you are like me and Tweet about the mundane minutia of the day, or whether you only Tweet about major life occurrences. It also depends on what kind of verbal communicator you are.... whether you feel the need to share, or want to hear, every single little detail of your or your boo-thang's day.

For me personally, I don't think it's a problem. Sometime Tweets are actually a conversation starter: "So what did you mean when you Tweeted........?" and you can further elaborate on those 137 characters you wrote at 1:22pm. On the flipside, though, on a particularly boring day there's really not much more than what was written in the day's Tweets, so there's really not much more to say.

So....... has anyone else noticed Twitter's impact on relationships and communication? Good, bad, indifferent?

Oh, and follow me on.

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Adventures in Divorce: "Did you see my Tweet about.......?"

"Did you see my Tweet about.......?"

So yes, loved ones, I know I've been seriously slacking on the blogging front. But it's really been for legitimate reason, I swear...... ok, maybe not swear, but that's my present argument. But for real, part of the reason is that this blog originally was to be about my "adventures" going through and post-divorce, and one very fruitful source of inspiration is the world of dating.

Well, I'm not dating.

Yes, loved ones, I've been officially boo'd up for quite some time now, so there is much less tom- and kimfoolery to write about.

Except.... there really is.

However, since I would like to remain outside of the world of dating, I can't write about all the issues I think about and deal with in the day to day world of relationships. Ok, so there are many benign topics I could write about if I would quit being lazy and actually sit down to a keyboard to type something other than a Tweet but anyone with a relationship-themed blog who is actually IN a relationship knows that this is a veritable minefield of potential drama (which means that the most open and honest relationship blogs come from those people who AREN'T in relationships..... hmmm, think about that for a minute, loved ones). And as a person who tends to not trip about many things that normal human beings trip about, thus leading me directly to these mines, my inclination has just been to avoid the field altogether as not to inadvertently cause an explosion by being asked to explain and justify what I meant or get grilled about the ulterior motives of my post. And I'm not falling into the trap of "Say whatever is on your mind..... I won't get mad."

*long Napoleon Dynamite-esq sigh*

Anyway, one thing I have noticed is not only how blogging has an impact on relationships (or rather, relationships have an impact on blogging) but also another relatively recent social networking phenomenon: Twitter. As the saying goes, you're nobody til somebody Tweets you..... ok, maybe not, but my point is that it seems EVERYONE is on Twitter these days, and most likely if you're on Twitter, your boo-thang is on Twitter, too. And of course you follow each other. The result of this is that you are privy to your love muffin's thoughts and experiences all day.

Cute and special, right? It's great that you know that your hunny got a speeding ticket the very MOMENT it happens (because true Twitter heads would be Tweeting the news while they are waiting for the cop to finish writing out the ticket), verdad?

Sure..... and no.

Of course you can e-interact with your boo with an @ reply, or even a direct message, which is almost, but not quite, the same thing as talking to them about it (I'm a believer that text messaging and e-mails and the like are valid forms of communication.... I'm a modern girl). The conundrum arises when you get home. Because your boo already knows that you got a speeding ticket, ate maque choux at Yats for lunch, found out your BFF is pregnant, and think your co-worker is a moron.... what is there left to talk about? I frequently find myself starting off conversations with "Did you see my Tweet about......?" Of course, I usually didn't go into the entire situation in 140 characters or less so I do have SOMETHING to talk about, but I've just noticed that Twitter has had a definite influence in my verbal communications, whether that's an assumption that he already knows what I'm talking about and has some frame of reference, or that the matter was so inconsequential that 140 characters was sufficient to address it and it doesn't need to be discussed again.

Two ways to look at this: (1) Twitter hinders conversation because you've already talked about what you were going to talk about so there's no need to talk about it again for fear of being redundant, or (2) Twitter filters out the BS chatter so you're not subject to it after a long day of work (more of a bonus for men who complain that their girls talk too damn much, but I'm not one of those type of women anyway). I guess this really depends on what type of Tweeter you are, whether you are like me and Tweet about the mundane minutia of the day, or whether you only Tweet about major life occurrences. It also depends on what kind of verbal communicator you are.... whether you feel the need to share, or want to hear, every single little detail of your or your boo-thang's day.

For me personally, I don't think it's a problem. Sometime Tweets are actually a conversation starter: "So what did you mean when you Tweeted........?" and you can further elaborate on those 137 characters you wrote at 1:22pm. On the flipside, though, on a particularly boring day there's really not much more than what was written in the day's Tweets, so there's really not much more to say.

So....... has anyone else noticed Twitter's impact on relationships and communication? Good, bad, indifferent?

Oh, and follow me on.

Labels: ,